Articles

England cricket Beard Rankings for 2017 international season open

In Uncategorized on May 27, 2017 by kmflett

Beard Liberation Front

27th May

Media Release, contact Keith Flett 07803 167266

England Beard Rankings for 2017 international season open

The Beard Liberation Front the informal network of beard wearers that campaigns against beardism, prejudice against the hirsute, has opened its beard rankings for the England team for the international season

The campaigners say that after careful early season observation and assessment they have identified 3 categories of beard:

Organic

Hipster

Proto (Spaghetti Western)

Organic Category

1 Moeen Ali

2 Jonny Bairstow

3 Ben Stokes

Hipster Category

1 Eoin Morgan

2 Liam Plunkett

3 Mark Wood

Spaghetti Western (proto-beard category)

1 Joe Root

2 Alex Hales

Beard Liberation Front organiser Keith Flett said, this is the most hirsute England cricket side for many years but that doesn’t mean that all beards are in the same category. We urge the Selector to pay close attention to the balance of facial hair styles before the Champions Trophy

A poll will place all players on the same ‘best beard’ benchmark and then attribute positions in each category, from time to time during the season, depending on the position each player has reached in the overall vote.

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