Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

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Organic Beard Wearers urged to avoid ‘Up, Up & Away’ Wind Damage

In Uncategorized on October 21, 2014 by kmflett

Beard Liberation Front
PRESS RELEASE
21st October
Contact Keith Flett 07803 167266

ORGANIC BEARD WEARERS URGED TO AVOID ‘UP, UP & AWAY’ WIND DAMAGE
The Beard Liberation Front, the informal network of beard wearers, has said that as the tail of Hurricane Gonzalo hits the UK those with organic beards are strongly advised to take special care of their follicles.

The campaigners says that while danger to life and limb is the central issue when extreme weather hits a secondary concern for beard wearers is that exposing the beard to high and blustery winds may blow the beard out of shape and may cause permanent follicle damage in some cases.

The BLF says that the key concern is for those with large organic beards in the style of Brian Blessed or David Bellamy. It is unlikely that designer beards will suffer significant wind damage.

The BLF advises the following precautions:
Keep the beard slightly damp at all times by immersing it in a glass of imperial stout. This will give solidity to the follicles and prevent them being blown around
Use a scarf to protect the follicles at all times
If the beard is blown out of shape use a hair dry to re-form the follicles in the correct position and then stay indoors for a several hours to allow the follicles to recover

BLF organiser Keith Flett said, it’s true that blustery weather can provide useful practice in beard waggling. The problem is that if the wind catches an untreated organic beard it can blow the wearer off their feet. This is known technically as ‘up, up and away’ syndrome.

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You Say You Want a Revolution? Russell Brand talks to Owen Jones

In Uncategorized on October 21, 2014 by kmflett

You Say You Want a Revolution: Owen Jones talks to Russell Brand
On Thursday 23rd October, a conversation between Owen Jones and Russell Brand will be live streamed [at 7pm]to cinemas across the UK. Unfortunately the discussion will not involve Brand giving Jones tips on how to grow a beard but instead a chat about Brand’s new book[y-wook]Revolution.

I checked and the cost of attending this 90 minute event is £10 or so. Frankly if you want to spend the money you might be better off heading down a bookshop and buying the book.

That said I don’t doubt many will attend and in my view that is a good thing. Engaging people generally in political discussion and whether it is possible to make the world a better place than it is now surely can’t be bad.

Of course if one looks on social media there is a lot of moaning and groaning. I can understand why.

Both Russell Brand and Owen Jones are formidable self publicists [I also try my hand at this in a small way..] and that irritates some. On the other hand the left has far too few people who can speak more or less coherently and get a big audience for doing so.

Brand’s book will without question spark discussion about ‘revolution’ as his interview with Jeremy Paxman created talk about the importance of voting [or not].

Many will say that Brand shouldn’t be taken too seriously, that he is maverick and so on. Probably so. He has however pitched up on a number of demonstrations recently. True he has no accountability to anyone but the left has always had its share of interesting characters. One thinks of John S Clarke, the Labour MP who was also a poet and a lion tamer.

Brand may well be more in the mould of the nineteenth century popular novelist GWM Reynolds. Reynolds wrote racy if social realistic books in the 1830s and 1840s and no doubt made much money. Around 1850 he decided he was a Chartist, not something that went down well with the existing Chartist leadership.

However he was prepared to publicise Chartism in his paper Reynolds’s News and he stuck with it. The paper was the biggest selling weekly paper in the later decades of the nineteenth century and retained its radical politics.

Others will object- and this is well covered in the pages of EP Thompson’s Making of the English Working Class- that the left should not be about popular leaders and great [mostly male] figures.

Rather the left is about grassroots organisation and movements that do not need to be told by the well-known and perhaps wealthy what they should do or think.

It is an attractive point but if there is a battle of ideas in society- and one which the Faragists are currently doing quite well at- having Russell Brand and Owen Jones live streamed across numerous cinemas talking about revolution can be no bad thing either.

Articles

The Ambridge Socialist: John Barleycorn to be performed live

In Uncategorized on October 20, 2014 by kmflett

The Ambridge Socialist
20th October CONTACT KEITH FLETT 07803 167266
The real Borsetshire Echo: 60 years of class struggle in Ambridge

John Barleycorn to be performed live
Following the dispute between Bert Fry and Joe Grundy at the recent Harvest Supper as to which version of John Barleycorn was really traditional [the Ambridge Socialist opted for Traffic’s version from 1970] the song will be performed live on London’s Bankside on Sunday October 26th.

It is part of the October Plenty festival:

http://www.thelionspart.co.uk/octoberplenty/

Ambridge Socialist Editor Keith Flett said, the issue of drinking, whether beer or cider, is central to the Archers so the question of which is the truly correct version of John Barleycorn is important. The October 26th festival offers another way to review this important matter

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The Ambridge Socialist: BBC was in plot to frame Ed Grundy for murder

In Uncategorized on October 19, 2014 by kmflett

The Ambridge Socialist
19th October CONTACT KEITH FLETT 07803 167266
The real Borsetshire Echo: 60 years of class struggle in Ambridge

BBC was in plot to frame Ed Grundy for murder
The Guardian has reported that the BBC planned to frame Ed Grundy for murder.

The plan was to frame Grundy for the murder of Helen Archer’s then partner, Greg the game keeper who sadly took his own life.

Grundy was only saved from being banged up for a crime he had not committed by the then Controller of Radio 4 Helen Boaden who stepped in to stop the plotters.

Ambridge Socialist Editor Keith Flett said, it just shows that the anti-proletarian bias in the BBC’s coverage of affairs in Ambridge knows few boundaries. Fortunately for Eddie Grundy in this case someone was prepared to step in before things went too far.

Link to Guardian report:

http://ht.ly/CKIeX

thanks to Hazel Potter

Depopulation in Ambridge
Ruth and David are thinking of leaving, kidnapping Jill to go with them. The Tuckers are already off to ‘leafy’ Brum and Hayley has also fled there to escape Roy. Which is understandable. Will Ambridge soon be a ghost town?

I Hate You
Phoebe’s view of Roy. It seems rather moderately expressed

In Other News
At the Harvest Supper Bert and the Grundys have squabbled over which is the correct version of John Barleycorn. The answer is that sung by Traffic in the July 1970 album of the same name

As David and Ruth prepare to value Brookfield the ruling Archer clique looks to be headed for a split. Look out for in depth reporting in future issues of the Ambridge Socialist

Panto Update: Lynda Snell is to star in her own one person show at Xmas. The name of the production is yet to be revealed…

Articles

Britain Needs a Pay Rise 18th October: on the impact of demonstrations

In Uncategorized on October 18, 2014 by kmflett

Britain Needs A Pay Rise, 18th October: on the impact of demonstrations

Articles appear regularly in the Financial Times noting that while the number of people in employment has risen- albeit these are often part time or self employed workers-wage levels mostly have not.

There are several results of this. One is that the economy has not recovered as quickly as might be thought. Many don’t have the extra cash to spend that would boost it. Another is that tax revenues are below forecast levels. That is partly because Government cut taxes for big business and a number of well-known Companies pay little or no tax anyway. It is also because if your wages aren’t going up then neither is the amount of tax you pay- adjustments by the Chancellor notwithstanding.

So the Britain Needs a Pay Rise demonstrations organised by the TUC in Belfast, London and Glasgow were well timed.

How big were they? I have no accurate idea. I was on the London demonstration. I arrived at Embankment a little after 11am- the advertised assembly time. By 1pm the section of the march we were in [by no means the back] had got has far as Embankment tube station. For those unfamiliar with the geography of central London that is a few hundred yards.

By getting on for 2pm [the march by then was passing through Trafalgar Square, the head had been in Hyde Park a while] I needed a toilet, wi-fi and coffee break.

Heading back on to the march disaster struck. Like the letter writer in EP Thompson’s Making of the English Working Class, my spectacles broke. Unlike him, but like John Hegley, I had a spare pair. In the process I got diverted into the Maille mustard shop on Piccadilly.

Anyway, the police have officially given up estimating numbers on marches [apparently]. The TUC have claimed 80-90,000 in London and some on social media suggested 150,000.

The point is, it was a large march about an important issue- truly representative of a lot of grassroots feeling up and down the country, to make an impact. Meanwhile guess what the Twitter feed of that well known alleged representative of the dispossessed, UKIP, had to say about the march. You’re right of course. Absolutely nothing.

There are reasons why it is so hard to assess what the numbers are like on large marches. You can guesstimate how many it takes to fill a certain space, or how long a march takes to pass a certain spot. But on such large and slow moving marches those on it ebb and flow all the time.

I spent a fair time on the march talking to a senior officer of my union about internal union affairs. A slow moving march is an ideal time for such a conversation.

When I dipped out for a pee I saw, as is always the case, numbers of marchers walking around, perhaps also going to the toilet, having a coffee or just meeting up with friends.

The point I’m making is that large marches are of course political occasions but social ones too where what is now called ‘networking’ takes place.

The impact of the march was enough anyway to get mainstream media coverage. It wasn’t just the size but the timing and the subject that drove that. Well done then to all those that organised the marches on 18th October. Hard work paid off.

If however anyone imagines that holding a march will be enough to sort out the problem of a lack of wage increases they will be sadly disappointed. Going on marches is not enough in days like these.

Articles

Moeen Ali, Leonard Cohen, Tim Howard & Roy Keane. Vote for Beard of Autumn

In Uncategorized on October 18, 2014 by kmflett

Beard Liberation Front

Press Release 18th October Contact Keith Flett 07803 167266

 

Roy Keane on Beard of Autumn Shortlist despite shaving

The Beard Liberation Front, the informal network of beard wearers, has said that Roy Keane of Aston Villa FC has secured his place on the Beard of Autumn shortlist despite his decision to shave his beard ahead of Ireland’s European Championship game against Gibraltar last Saturday.

Keane has a history of suddenly shaving his beard but the campaigners say that the four seasonal awards run each year are designed to capture in particular those who have noteworthy but transient beards.

Keene will face England cricket Moeen Ali, veteran singer Leonard Cohen and Everton goal keeper Tim Howard after they topped an on-line poll to determine the shortlist

The Award is the final one of four seasonal Awards before the announcement of the coveted Beard of the Year Award at the end of December.

The Quarterly Awards focus on beards who have made an impact in the public eye during the three month period.

The winner will be proclaimed on 24th October after a poll of BLF supporters and a public vote via social media

BLF Organiser Keith Flett said Keane’s beard may be gone but its Beard Power is clearly still a significant presence on the Beard of Autumn poll

 

Beard of Autumn Shortlist

Votes for the Shortlist are open until 6pm on Thursday 23rd October. The winner will be announced on Friday 24th October

Moeen Ali, Top performing England cricketer

Leonard Cohen, Performer

Tim Howard, Everton goalkeeper

Roy Keane, Aston Villa FC manager

Articles

Beard of the Dead at Tottenham Ploughman’s Day of the Dead

In Uncategorized on October 17, 2014 by kmflett

Beard Liberation Front
press release 17th October
Contact keith flett 07803 167266
_____________________________________________________
BEARD OF THE DEAD AT TOTTENHAM PLOUGHMAN’S DAY OF THE DEAD

The Beard Liberation Front, the informal network of beard wearers, has said that it plans a competition for the Beard of the Dead at the Tottenham Ploughman’s Day of the Dead event to be held at Downhills Community Café in Tottenham on Sunday November 2nd.

The hirsute campaigners say while the flesh may be weak, the beard often has an afterlife along with the skull and zombies with beards appear to be plentiful.

However on November 2nd the competition will focus on the connection between the beard and the head and how dialectically in balance the two are.

For example people with long faces may find that a beard softens their features. People with shorter faces such as Antony Worrall Thompson might take the hint that a beard doesn’t help

BLF Organiser Keith Flett said it’s a new departure for us and we should emphasise that it is not a modern attempt at phrenology. The competition is purely about how the beard is balanced with the rest of the head not what size the head is

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